Benson's Revenge R version
by leeluvr2
Summary: What will Lee do when someone who blames him tries to use Amanda for revenge? If you've read this before, there are no substantial changes. I've "chaptered" the story to prepare for possible 3rd chapter.
1. Default Chapter

Title:                "Benson's Revenge"

Author:             leeluvr2

Disclaimer:        'Scarecrow and Mrs. King' belongs to Shoot the Moon and Warner Brothers Productions.

Rating:              R -- depicts some violence, adult sexual situations

Timeline:           Late second season, with references to "The Mole," written by Cliff Gould, and "Ship of Spies," written by Robert Bielak

Summary:         A/U -- What will Lee do when someone who blames him tries to use Amanda for revenge?

Feedback:        Always welcome

Acknowledgements:  Thank you to all the beta readers at the Yahoo Group, and especially nectar99.  Your input, feedback and encouragement are what got this story written.

* * *

6:30 PM

Lee opened his apartment door slowly, praying the hinges wouldn't squeak.  He didn't know if they were actually noisy; he didn't usually pay attention.  Now, however, it was very important that the door swing quietly.  The last phone call with David Benson had said they were here – waiting for him.

He entered, silently, gun drawn.  As he peered into the living room in the dusky light, he waited a moment for his eyes to adjust to the near darkness of early evening.  He didn't dare turn on a light to announce his arrival.  The wait gave him a moment to reflect on the day's events, the ones that lead him here.

* * *

10:30 AM

Lee looked again at the conference room clock.  It had been over two hours since he sent Amanda to retrieve the Sandusky file from his apartment.  Last night's dinner with Sheila had, inevitably, lasted through coffee this morning.  Distracted and in a hurry to make Billy's 8:30 meeting, he'd forgotten the folder on his coffee table.    Lee remembered the file just as he was pulling into his parking spot and swore loudly to himself.  He'd never make it back to his apartment for the file and still be on time for Billy's meeting.

As he sat there trying to decide what to do, he heard a light tapping on the trunk of his car and looked in the rearview mirror.  There was Amanda, waving and walking toward his driver side door.  'This is your lucky day, Stetson,' he thought to himself.

"Amanda, can you do me a favor?" he asked her while climbing out of his car.

"Well, hello yourself!  And how are you today?" she answered with just a touch of sarcasm.  He knew she thought he had the worst manners.

Lee rolled his eyes, placed his left hand on the small of her back to get her moving toward IFF, and held out his right hand to pass her his set of keys.

"Good morning.  How are you?" he replied smoothly.

"Fine, and you?"

"Great.  Can you do me a favor?"  Lee wasted no time trying to get to the point, all the while moving toward the building to make his meeting on time.

As Amanda accepted his keys, she gave a little sigh. "What do you need me to do?"

"I forgot a file on my coffee table that I'll need for a meeting at noon today.  Billy's 8:30 is about to start, and I can't be late again.  Can you go to my place, get the file and bring it back here?"

"What's the file look like?"

"I don't know, it's just a file folder...on my coffee table."

"I've seen your coffee table – if I don't know what it looks like, I may never find it."

Lee stopped in his tracks and turned to face her.  He ran his hand through his hair in annoyance, but tried to keep his voice calm.  After all, he did need a favor.  "Look, it's the Sandusky file.  That name's on it somewhere."

"_If_ I can find it, what do you want me to do with it when I get back here?" she asked as they once again began walking toward the office.

"Just put it on my desk, it's not Top Secret or anything.  I'll get it when I'm out of Billy's meeting."  Lee stopped once more, giving Amanda his most charming, dimpled smile.  "Thanks, Amanda.  You're a life saver!"

"Yeah...a lifesaver," she'd muttered.

* * *

10:35 AM

That was at 8:15.  From where Lee sat in the conference room, he could see his desk through the open blinds and Amanda had not yet returned.

He was about to excuse himself from the meeting to make a phone call, when Billy began to wrap up.

"One final item, team.  A former Agent who was arrested last year for espionage and treason, escaped custody yesterday.  They were transferring David Benson to a medium security facility, and while we have no reason to think ..."

"What?!  How the hell did that happen?"  Lee's outburst interrupted Billy.

"We don't have all the details, yet; but it appears he had outside help," Billy calmly responded.  "Someone knew he was being transferred, and the route they would take." 

"Great!  Just great!  We go to all that trouble to find out he's a mole and catch him, testify against him, get him locked up, and they _lose_ him?"  It was times like this that Lee wondered if they were really making any difference, or why he even bothered to care so much about his job.  "Is he armed?"

"As I was about to say," Billy continued while giving Lee a pointed look, "We have no reason to believe he's armed or dangerous, or that he even stayed in the DC area.  Most likely he's trying to run and get out of the country.  Now, we'll be watching the airports, train stations, and bus terminals – trying to cover the border crossings – but with Benson's training, it may be very difficult to re-capture him."

Lee knew what Billy said was probably true, but something about this whole thing was giving him a sick feeling.  He remembered how Benson had glared at him as they took him from the hearing room in handcuffs, his sentence of 15 to 20 years in prison just pronounced.  Lee was the one betrayed by a friend, yet David Benson had been the one with hatred in his eyes.

"Okay, people.  That wraps it up for this morning – have a safe day."

Lee was out of his chair before Billy even finished his second sentence.  As he opened the door and headed into the bullpen, he called out to anyone listening, "Are there any messages for me?"  No answers.  When he reached his desk, he dialed the extension for the Agency's message center.  "Yeah, this is Lee Stetson.  Were there any calls for me?   Nothing?"

He hung up the phone and quickly dialed his home number.  After four rings, his answering machine picked up, _'This is Lee Stetson.  Leave a message after the tone and I'll return your call.  Beep'_

"Amanda?  Are you there?" Lee impatiently waited a few seconds, hoping she would be there and answer the phone. "Amanda, if you're there, pick-up!"

He dropped the receiver into its cradle.  'Dammit! Where could she be?'

* * *

12:00 noon

It had taken Lee longer than he hoped to get into his apartment.  He had to make excuses for missing the 12 o'clock meeting.  Then he had to borrow a car from the motor pool, since Amanda had all his keys.  Leatherneck must have been having a slow day because he certainly took his time and kept trying to draw Lee into conversation.

Then he had to explain to his doorman that he needed a duplicate key to his apartment, which Mr. Feller assumed was intended for one of his 'lady friends.'  He, too, seemed intent on making conversation, and Lee knew his, "Later, Mr. Feller," was rude, but at the moment he was too anxious to care.

"Should have just picked the lock," he muttered to himself as he stepped into the elevator.

The first thing he noticed in his apartment was that the Sandusky file was gone.  Amanda had been here, but where had she gone?

After a quick walk through his apartment to make sure she wasn't there, and to see if anything was out of order, Lee headed back down to the lobby.

"Mr. Feller, a friend of mine stopped by earlier today to pick-up something for me.  Did you see her?  She's about so tall," he gestured, "brown hair, slim ...?"

"Mrs. King!  Yes, she said hello on her way in.  What a nice lady!  Although, I have to say, she certainly isn't your usual type, is she?"  For a doorman, Floyd Feller certainly could get pretty personal.

"Did she say anything when she left?"

"No, not to me," Mr. Feller turned away from Lee as he walked a half dozen paces to open the door for a departing resident.  "But the gentleman who was here with her waved and said good-bye," 

"Hold it … what _gentleman_?"  Lee's voice held an edge, and a hint of panic began its slow twist.  "What did he look like?"

"Oh, I don't know," he tipped his hat to the pretty blonde leaving the building.  "Average height, brown hair, late 30's maybe."

"Are you sure he was _with_ her?"

"Well, she came in alone, but he seemed to be waiting for her when she left."

* * *

2:00 PM

"Dammit, Billy!  I'm telling you, she's in trouble and I need to find her!" Lee paced the office, unable to settle into a chair for more than a minute at a time.  He had returned to the Agency, and was now venting his frustration on Billy and Francine.

"I realize that, Scarecrow, but do you have any other ideas?"  Billy began to count off their actions so far, "We've already got a description of Amanda and her car out to all the local police departments.  Francine has checked with the hospitals, and there's no sign of her.  We haven't heard from her or anyone who knows anything about her. What else do you expect us to do?"

"Aagghh!" Lee's nervous habit of running his hand through his hair did little to calm him.  "I don't know...all I know is I can't just sit here."

"So.  You're just going to go out driving the streets?"  Billy's look told him what he thought of that idea.  "Unfortunately, Scarecrow, your doorman wasn't able to give a very detailed description of the guy to our sketch artist.  Without something to go on, we're at a loss here."

"So…what?  We just wait?"  As Lee moved to sit in the chair across from Billy's desk, he sounded almost resigned, "What if we don't hear anything?"

"We're bound to hear something, sooner or later."

Lee rested his elbows on his knees then put his head in his hands.  'How the hell did this happen?  It was just a damn file folder!'

They both jumped at the sound of Billy's phone ringing.  "Melrose here.  Amanda?"  Their eyes met, and Billy heard Lee's sharp intake of breath.  "Yeah, he's right here."  As he handed the receiver to Lee, he mouthed the words, 'Something's wrong.'

"Amanda, where are you?"

"Lee?  I…I'm not sure where we are right now," her voice sounded shaky, as if she had been crying.

"Amanda, what do you mean 'we'?  Who's with you?"

She was not the one who responded.  Lee heard a male voice that he recognized very well.  "I just wanted you to know she's alive."

"Benson," Lee stated as if to convey to Billy who it was.  The muscle in his jaw twitched as he tried to control his anger before speaking.  "You hurt her and there won't be anywhere for you to hide."

"She's not the one I want to hurt.  She's just insurance, and the ticket I need to get you to come to me."

"Yeah?  Well then, you don't need her.  Just tell me where you are, Benson – I'll be there."

"Not so fast.  We're going to do this my way."

* * *

6:35 PM

Benson had run Lee all over town, all afternoon.  Phone call after phone call at telephone booths throughout the District, making sure he wasn't being tailed and that Lee didn't have time to set-up some kind of trap.

His last call had said they were here at his apartment.  Lee stepped forward, cautiously –his body tense and his eyes darting from side to side to spot potential danger.  Where was Benson?  Was this just a wild goose chase, or was he hiding in another room hoping to catch him off guard.

As he stared down the hall toward the bedroom, the door opened.  David Benson moved partially into the hallway, right hand holding a gun, his left still hidden in the bedroom.

"Hello, Scarecrow," David sounded cocky and confident.  "I've been expecting you."

"Drop the gun, Benson, and come out here...you have nowhere to go," Lee said the words as he raised his arms and leveled his gun at Benson's head.

As David stepped further into the hallway, he flexed his left arm, dragging his captive into the open with him – Amanda.  His left hand held her by a fistful of hair, and she was straining backward to try and ease the pain of his grip.  The barrel of his gun turned from Lee to Amanda's head.

"I don't think I have to worry about where to go," David stated.  "I really think you'll let me do whatever I want, as long as I have her."

The muscle in Lee's jaw twitched as he clenched his teeth, his raw anger at Benson controlled by his concern for Amanda's safety.  He had a clear shot at his head, but knew shooting Benson could easily cause a reflexive action that might get Amanda hurt.  Lee's instincts were trying to quickly process the situation and find a safe way out for himself and, more importantly, Amanda.

"Drop your gun, Lee!" David roughly ordered, while pulling Amanda closer to him and wrapping his left arm around her shoulders.  He now held her tightly pinned against his body and Lee's clean head-shot was lost.

Lee carefully dropped his gun at his feet.  "Kick it out of the way!"  David wasn't taking any chances.  He gave it a gentle kick off to his left – hoping to keep it close enough in case he had an opportunity.  David snorted, recognizing the tactic but confident in his power over him while he held Amanda captive.

He took a moment to look away from David's face into Amanda's eyes.  She was terrified.  He'd seen Amanda in dangerous circumstances before, and her confidence in his ability to rescue her had always been visible just below the surface of her fear.  But this time, she was too close to her attacker, and Lee was too far away to offer the assurance of his presence.  He needed her to 'connect' with him, instead of being so tuned into Benson by her fear.

"Benson, let her go! This is between you and me.  You don't need her here to take me out and be on your way," he was stalling for time, but he also hoped the sound of his voice would get through to Amanda.

David didn't seem to hear him.  He briefly closed his eyes, and inhaled deeply of Amanda's hair.  "Ahh, Scarecrow.  I couldn't believe it when both you and Amanda told me that you two are 'just business,' nothing personal."  David's eyes took on a gleam.  

"She's beautiful, don't you think?"  His left hand came up to cup her chin and he pointed her face toward Lee.  "Her fragrance...her softness," as he slowly caressed her cheek with his fingertips.  "Have you ever kissed her, Lee?" he asked.  The memory of San Angelo came unbidden to Lee's mind.  The first, required kiss, followed by the second more gentle and sincere kiss – the one that wasn't necessary but he couldn't resist.

"Of course you haven't.  You two are just business, right?"  David was taking great pleasure in taunting him.  "But I have. When we dated last year...some tender goodnight kisses. You really should try it some time.  She's very soft, and sweet ..." He pressed his lips to her right ear, then lightly moved down the column of her neck, never taking his eyes from Lee's.  "It's like a vague memory of some long-forgotten treat.  You can't quite place it, but you know you enjoy it."  Again, the mocking gleam.  He was successfully prodding Lee's anger.

Lee needed to take control of the situation, and he needed to connect with Amanda, somehow.  He again looked from Benson to Amanda.  As Benson dropped his hand from her chin, he pulled her close and began to sensuously rub his left hand up and down her shoulder.  That's when he saw it.  The spark of anger and defiance in her eyes that told him she'd had enough – she was ready, and he needed to be prepared for that split second when she would do something unexpected.  He'd seen that look before.

"You know, David, I actually have kissed Amanda.  And you're right, it's pretty special," he spoke in the hope of distracting Benson from Amanda. He knew, given a small opportunity, Amanda would act.

David's surprised look told him he hadn't expected that.  "Well, well, well.  All that talk about 'just business' was just a front, huh?"  His attention turned to Lee.  "I should have known you couldn't pass up a beautiful woman – reputation to maintain, and all that."

Lee now had Amanda's full attention.  Suddenly her fear seemed to be gone and in her eyes he could see that her faith in him was restored.  She was prepared and waiting for the right moment. 

He needed to bait David, to anger him and catch him off guard. What better way than to stir up their old rivalry over women?

"Benson, that was always your problem.  You think you can force yourself on women.  You never could figure out when they didn't want to have anything to do with you." Lee saw David's expression change from cocky confidence to anger.

"Overly confident.  Too damn sure of yourself to know when you've totally screwed up," Lee continued to press.  "Women, your job...you just never knew at what point you became the joke.  That's what got you caught, and that's what got you sent to jail."

David was now totally focused on Lee.  He'd turned his gun back toward him, no longer paying attention to Amanda.  It was the brief moment she needed.  As David's grip relaxed slightly, she strained forward while kicking backward into his kneecap.  When his arm fully released her in his surprise and pain, she lunged toward the living room, falling to the floor.

That was all the time Lee needed.  He sprang forward into Benson, grabbing his right arm and slamming it against the wall again and again until the gun fell from his hand.  Lee had a good three inches on him, but David was no lightweight.  Lee pulled back with his right hand, preparing to swing, but he barely had time to duck as Benson's left fist grazed his jaw.  Benson lunged forward, swinging with his right but unable to make contact as Lee blocked with his left arm, then immediately followed through with his right.

David leaned heavily against the wall, dazed, and Lee used the opportunity to take a breath.  When he lowered his arms, he felt disappointment – his victory bittersweet.  He had hoped to battle longer, enraged at the sight of Amanda in his arms.

As Lee turned, seeking out Amanda, he saw movement out of the corner of his eye.  Turning suddenly, he was surprised to see that David had recovered so quickly.  A right hook caught Lee totally off-guard.  The blow took him by surprise more than it actually hurt, but it was enough to knock him to the ground.  Benson quickly retrieved his gun from where it had fallen near his feet and took aim at Lee.

As he lay on the floor, staring up at Benson and the barrel of his gun, Lee saw him smirk and knew he would not hesitate.  For a brief second his thoughts turned to Amanda – he hoped she had run out of the apartment to safety.  As he watched Benson's eyes narrow, he held his breath, waiting for the inevitable.  He heard the gunshot, then another, and another.

His head turned quickly to his left as he realized he wasn't the one who was shot – David was falling to the floor, a surprised look on his face and blood spreading from his right shoulder.

Lee scrambled to his feet when he saw Amanda advancing toward David, her eyes wide and her breath coming in gasps.  As Benson lay on the floor in pain and shock, Amanda stood over him, both hands clutching Lee's gun aimed at his head.

"Amanda," Lee moved quickly to her side.  He gently reached for her hands, covering them.  "Amanda, please...give me the gun."

She turned toward him, her hands trembling, but her face showing no emotion. Although she was looking right at him, Lee couldn't tell if she actually saw him.  "Amanda, give me the gun.  It's over," he crooned softly as he slowly removed the gun from her grip.

As she released the gun he saw anger flash in her eyes, followed by confusion, then finally recognition. Lee pulled her to him, fragile and shaking.  He held her close as he pointed the gun at David Benson, willing him to try something.  Benson let his head fall back to the floor, defeat accepted.

Still clutching Amanda, Lee backed toward the phone and called the Agency.  "Billy, I've found Amanda. I need EMS and a cleanup crew."

"Lee, what's going on?" Billy Melrose sounded tense and concerned.  "Where are you?"

"We're at my apartment.  Just get over here with a cleanup crew and I'll explain everything."  He wanted to get this over with so he could take the time to really comfort Amanda.

* * *

7:45 PM

As the EMS team wheeled Benson to the ambulance on a stretcher, Amanda sat on Lee's couch staring, unseeing, out the window at the streetlight.  Lee couldn't take his eyes off her, and he was answering Billy's questions automatically, without much thought.  He wanted to get through this part of it so he could sit with Amanda, pull her to him and hold her close – he needed that comfort as much as she did.

"Lee, you know we'll need to get a statement from Amanda."  This comment from Billy got through to Lee.  He turned to meet Billy's gaze.

"Can't it wait until tomorrow?" Lee asked, already knowing the answer.

"Look, Scarecrow, there was a shooting here...justified...but still a shooting that needs to be explained.  With Amanda's status as 'agent in training,' I think we'll be all right on legal grounds, but she's going to have to tell her side of it," Billy voice rose in frustration as he ended his sentence. 

"Agghh!"  Lee impatiently ran his fingers through his hair.  "Are we through here?" he questioned, anxious to be near Amanda.

"For now," was Billy's reply.

As he walked toward the couch, Francine looked up at him from her spot sitting next to Amanda.  He had one question in his eyes, 'Is she alright?'  Francine shook her head slightly, released Amanda's hand with a soft murmur to her and relinquished her spot to Lee.

As soon as he sat next to her, Amanda leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his shoulder.  He embraced her and held on as tightly as he could without hurting her.  She still wasn't crying, and that worried him.  She seemed to be in shock and he wished she could release the emotions that must be warring within her.

"Lee ...?" spoken so softly he barely heard her whisper.

"Hmmm ...?"

"I...I thought...I wanted to...kill him."  Her words were muffled as she spoke with her face buried against his chest.  "How could I ever feel like that?"  Her question was pleading.  He knew she struggled with the idea of feeling that much hatred for someone, anyone.

All he could do was pull her closer to his chest, whispering meaningless, comforting words, "It's all right, Amanda.  It's over and he can't hurt you again."

He wished that he had been the one to retrieve his gun.  Lee had no problem with the hatred he felt for Benson.  He likely would have killed rather than just wounded him, and that thought didn't bother him at all.

"Lee, we need to get started."  Billy seemed hesitant to interrupt. Lee's glare told him he wanted this postponed.

"Now.  And Amanda needs to do this on her own."  That was Billy's not-so-subtle way of telling him he needed to release Amanda and move away from her during the questioning.

Lee reluctantly stood to move across the room and lean against a wall where he still had full view of Amanda, so small and vulnerable on his couch.  He knew she needed to do this on her own without relying on him.  Finding her own strength would begin her recovery.

Billy sat on the coffee table across from her and began the questioning.

* * *

9:00 PM

"As he had me pressed against him...as he...kissed my neck," Amanda struggled with her memories.  An hour into her questioning, she was feeling the strain of recalling the events of the day.  "I could feel him...his ..." Amanda faltered, her face reddening as she recalled what had happened – embarrassed that she had to tell others.  She closed her eyes and swallowed hard, then tried again, "I could feel _him_, against my...hip," she gestured with her right hand to indicate where she could still feel his erection pressed against her.  She lowered her head, too anguished to meet their eyes and willing this to be over quickly.

"Oh, God," Lee closed his eyes briefly against the sick churning in his stomach.  He hadn't known about this, but realized that must have been the moment he'd seen the spark in her eye.  The realization did nothing to calm the bile that threatened to rise in his throat.  He quickly pushed himself away from the wall, intent on being at Amanda's side.

"Scarecrow!" Billy yelled, stopping Lee short.

"Dammit, Billy!  The sick son-of-a- ..." Lee caught himself and glanced at Amanda's bowed head as she seemed intent on studying her own hands.  "He _enjoyed_ tormenting her," he continued in a low voice.

"She needs to get through this – on her own.  You know that as well as I do!" Billy took a breath, then continued in a calmer voice.  "The sooner she finishes telling her story, the sooner she can get past this."  Lee studied Billy intently for a moment.  His emotions were raw, and his self-control was near the breaking point – but he knew Billy was right.

He looked helplessly at Amanda as she raised her head, tears finally spilling slowly and silently from her eyes.  "Lee, it's...I'm alright."  She took a deep breath and, using both hands, wiped the tears from her cheeks.  "I'll be okay."  She then took in another calming breath before continuing.

"Lee said something to David, I think he was trying to keep him talking, or distract him...something.  As I felt David's grip loosen I knew I might never get another chance."  Amanda stopped, trying to organize the thoughts she had at the time.  "The self defense classes I'd taken said, 'Go for the eyes, the groin or the knee caps.'  I thought my best opportunity was to try and kick his kneecap, so that's what I did.  I think it mostly gave me the forward momentum I needed to fall to the floor."

Lee's thoughts went back to that moment.  'You were great, Amanda.  You fought back – good for you!' Although he wouldn't say the words aloud, especially not in front of Billy and Francine, he couldn't help but be proud of her for fighting not to be a victim.

"Anyway, that gave Lee the chance he needed to fight with David – get his gun away from him and try to help me."  Amanda again hesitated, as if she was unsure what to say next.  She licked her lips then continued.

"I saw David hit Lee and he fell to the floor.  That's when I saw Lee's gun by my feet.  When David aimed at Lee, I just picked up the gun and started firing...I don't even really remember aiming – just pulling the trigger," Amanda's voice faded, and Lee recalled her actions.  She'd walked toward Benson, stood over him while he lay helpless and bleeding on the floor.  She had aimed at his head ...

Lee knew Amanda didn't want to face what she felt at that moment, and he needed to do something to encourage her.  "Amanda, you're doing great.  It's almost over," he tried to reassure her.  Her brown eyes met his hazel ones, and the look she gave him was filled with so much pain.

As she continued to look directly at Lee, all her emotions playing across her features, she tried to finish.  "I...I walked toward...him with...Lee's...gun ..." she was now sobbing between her words.  That was it, Lee could watch no more. Once again he pushed away from the wall.

"Scarecrow!" Billy yelled again, this time to no avail.

As he sat beside her, he pulled Amanda to him.  "Look, Billy!  Benson and I fought, Amanda found my gun and shot him, then I took the gun from her...okay?"

That was as much as Lee would allow, and it was as close to the truth as they needed.  No one had to know exactly what was said between David Benson and Lee – what words were used to provoke the Scarecrow, or what words were used to cause Benson to loosen his grip on Amanda.  Lee still didn't know for sure everything Amanda felt while she held his gun, but he had his suspicions.  As far as he was concerned, enough of the story was told to declare this a justified shooting, and move on.

* * *

10:00 PM

As Billy, Francine and the cleanup team prepared to leave the apartment, Lee still held Amanda.  Her sobbing had subsided and he knew that exhaustion was her next step.

"Scarecrow, I'll see you at the office tomorrow," Billy said as a farewell greeting.  Lee glanced up, nodded, and then returned his attention to Amanda as the front door closed, finally leaving them alone.

He was content to hold her in silence, for as long as she wanted – hours, days if necessary.

She spoke too soon to suit him.  "Lee?"

"Hmmm?"

"I'm so tired," her voice was barely a whisper.

"I know," he soothed.  He moved his right arm to reach beneath her legs and began to lift her as he rose from the couch.

"No, Lee ..." Amanda tried to protest.

"Sshhh, Amanda.  It's all right.  Get some sleep, and when you wake up, I'll drive you home."  She relented and Lee carried her to his bedroom.  As he gently laid her on his bed, her arms remained around his neck and he sat on the edge.

"Lee...thank-you," she murmured, already drifting off to sleep.

"For what?" he smiled slightly at the look of her half-closed eyes and her hair spread across his pillow.

" 'For what?' he asks" she gently chided.  "For rescuing me...and for everything after that."  She pulled him to her and kissed his cheek, ever so softly.  She then released him, sighed and immediately fell asleep.

As he stood looking at her sleeping in his bed, he still couldn't quite figure out his feelings for Amanda.  All he knew was that she was safe and here with him – that was enough, for now.

-- Continued --


	2. Chapter 2

Acknowledgement:       Thanks to IamInvisibleToo for beta'ing this in it's infancy.  It's grown quite a bit since then, but she was courageous enough to point out the weaknesses.  Thanks, also, to MarySueStetson for trying to teach me POV.  Any errors or really crappy storytelling are totally my fault.

* * *

11:30 PM

Lee sat on the couch trying to read the book he started earlier in the week.  Amanda had fallen asleep in his bed about an hour ago and he wanted to quietly occupy himself until it was time to drive her home.  After his third attempt at reading the same page, he closed the book in frustration.  Images of the day's events wouldn't leave him alone.  He kept seeing Benson gripping Amanda, stroking and kissing her.  His anger grew every time he thought about how much Benson enjoyed it.

"Lee!" he heard her scream and acted immediately.  "Lee!"

He grabbed his gun from the end table and was off the couch before the second scream.  As he swung the bedroom door open and rushed in, he quickly scanned the room but found only Amanda, sitting wide-eyed in the middle of his bed.

Placing his gun on the nightstand, he sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her to him.  "Sshhh...it's all right.  Everything's going to be okay.  It's just a bad dream."

He felt her shudder and tightened his embrace.  "A dream? ...it seemed so real…" she pulled away to look into his eyes.  "He died, didn't he?  I killed him…"

"No," he rubbed her back to calm her.  "No, Amanda...I talked to Billy.  He's going to be okay."

"He's not dead?" she searched his face, needing to believe him and looking for any sign he was hiding the truth.

"No, he's going to be just fine," Lee assured her.  "Then he's going back to jail.  This time they'll keep him in maximum security. He won't hurt you again," he finished with determination.

She released a shaky sigh, then stood and began to pace in front of him.  "Lee, I still can't believe I shot him.  You know how I feel about guns," her pacing stopped and she turned to face him.

"I know," he agreed with her.

"But...I saw him...standing over you.  And your gun was right there by me.  I had to do _something_," she said the last statement with force, as if she was trying to convince him – or maybe herself.

"Yes, and I'm very glad you did.  C'mere," he extended his right arm to encourage her to sit with him.

As she leaned her head on his shoulder and softly placed her hand on his chest, he continued the back rub that made her relax in his arms.  They stayed that way for a while, neither one saying anything.  He was content just to hold her as her trembling stopped.

"He used me, Lee.  I never even suspected what he had in mind – I was so foolish," her fist lightly hit his shoulder in frustration.

"Hey, you were not foolish.  You said yourself you didn't know what he had in mind."

"No, Lee...you don't understand," she pulled away from him and shook her head.  "I was surprised to see him in the lobby, but I wasn't afraid of him.  I should have been.  When...when he smiled...and said he was there to see you, I just kept walking.  It wasn't until I passed Mr. Feller that I saw his gun."

"I…" he shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, not sure where she was going with this.  "You're right...I don't understand.  You didn't do anything wrong."

She looked directly into his eyes, as if pleading for him to understand.  "Don't you see?  He _knew_.  He knew he could get you to come to him...by holding me," she emphasized her point by placing her hand on her chest.  "He used me – to get to you.  I should have run away, but instead I just kept walking until it was too late."  She turned away from him and began to anxiously pluck at the fabric of her jeans.

He grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her to face him.  "Amanda," he dipped his head to get her to look at him.  "Hey, look at me."

When she raised her chin, unshed tears shimmered in her eyes; but Lee also saw a strength there.  She was determined not to cry anymore because of David Benson.

"He had a gun, Amanda, and forced you to go with him.  Depending on how all this turned out, he *may* have shot you no matter what.  But I have no doubt he *would* have shot you if you had run."  He captured both her hands in his, giving them a reassuring squeeze.  "The fact that he could get to me through you, well...that's a weakness of working with a partner," he hoped that explanation sounded truer to her than it did to him.  A voice in the back of his mind whispered, 'It's more than that, and you know it.'

His thumbs gently massaged her fingers as he told that voice to be quiet.  "So he got to me through you, so what?  You'd do the same for me, wouldn't you?"

"That's not the same," she protested.

"Oh, really?" he raised a questioning eyebrow. "How is it not the same?"

"It would never happen that way, Lee.  You have a lot that can be compromised, I don't," she looked down to where he held her hands in his lap.

"I'll have to disagree with that," he reached under her chin and forced her to look back into his eyes.  "There's always your poppy seed cake recipe," he tried to tease her, then felt rewarded when he saw her broad smile.

"Not exactly a State secret, Scarecrow," she joined in the teasing.

His smile turned into a dimpled grin and he reached to smooth a stray lock of hair from her cheek then let his hand remain where it was.  As he lightly caressed her cheek with his thumb, she closed her eyes and leaned into his hand.  Such a simple gesture on her part and it went straight to his heart.

The trust she had in him, and the comfort she drew from him, filled him with desires.  A desire to protect her.  A desire to always see her safe and happy.  A desire... She opened her eyes and he saw longing in their brown depths. Realizing she must see the same reflected in hazel, he withdrew his hand and looked away, fearing she'd already seen too much.  "I, uh...I'd better drive you home," he stood and extended his hand to help her off the bed.

* * *

For a moment she didn't move.  What just happened?  She had closed her eyes and rested her cheek against the soothing warmth of his palm.  Hard as she tried, she couldn't stop the questions that whispered in her mind.  How many times had she thanked God and fate for that morning at the train station?  And exactly when had she realized she was falling in love with Lee?

When she had opened her eyes, the look on Lee's face was so tender, and she'd seen a flicker of...something... Just as quickly, his expression became shuttered and he practically jumped off the bed, offering his hand.

"Yeah...I, um...I should get going," she said as she accepted his assistance.  His fingers closed around hers, and she felt the familiar current she'd come to expect whenever they had the slightest physical contact.  He quickly released her hand and reached for his gun on the nightstand.

Headed toward the living room, he called to her over his shoulder, "You know, it's close to midnight.  How are you going to explain to your mother?"

"Oh, I'm not worried.  I don't think she's had time to miss me, yet."

He turned in the doorway, looking totally confused.  "What do you mean she hasn't had time to miss you?  You've been gone all day."

"I know, but she took the boys to Aunt Lillian's yesterday and we already talked this morning.  They won't call again until tomorrow," she swung her purse over her shoulder as she walked toward him.

"Wait...hold it.  You're gonna be home alone?"  He didn't budge, effectively blocking the doorway and keeping her from leaving the bedroom.

She shifted her weight to her left foot and put her fist on her right hip.  "I've been home alone before."

"Yeah, but Amanda...I don't think you should be alone tonight."  He still didn't move from his spot.

"I'll be fine, Lee."

"You're having nightmares," he argued.

"Just that one – and it's not the first time I've had a nightmare."  She couldn't believe he was being so obstinate.  "Look, you told me you spoke with Billy and David's going to be okay.  I'll go home, have a mug of warm milk and go to bed.  If I can't sleep, I'll get up and have another.  I'll be fine."

"No," he said stubbornly.  "You've got two choices here.  Either you stay here and I sleep on _my_ couch, or I take you home and I sleep on _your_ couch.  You're not spending the rest of the night alone."

"Lee, you don't want to be sleeping on a couch."

"Amanda, I will sleep in my car in front of your house if I have to.  Now what's it gonna be?"

She considered him for a moment.  Really, she didn't want to go home to an empty house, but she also didn't want him to think she was afraid.

Her hesitation was her defeat.  She saw a triumphant flash in his eyes and a smug smile.  He walked to the dresser and began opening drawers.  "Look, I have tee-shirts, and I know there's a pair of sweat pants here that are too small for me, if you want them," he threw the clothes on the bed then turned to face her.  "And I even have a new toothbrush that hasn't been opened yet.  Why not just stay here, and I'll drive you home in the morning?"

She sighed, knowing she'd lost.  "Ill stay under one condition."

"What's that?" he asked cautiously.

"Do you have any food?  I haven't eaten since breakfast."

He laughed and immediately relaxed.  "I think I can find something here for us to eat."

She smiled at him, wondering what he would possibly find that was edible.  "Mind if I wash up?"

"Yeah, sure.  Towels are in the closet in there, and the toothbrush is in the cabinet above the sink," he gestured toward the bathroom.  "In the meantime, I'll see if I can find something other than week-old pizza and moldy cheese," he winked and grinned at her. 

* * *

2:00 AM

Lee snapped awake.  He strained to hear whatever it was that interrupted his sleep, but the apartment was totally quiet.  Knowing something must have disturbed him, he threw the blanket over the back of the couch and rose quietly to go check on Amanda.

He opened the door only to find the bed empty.  For a half second his gut twisted, until her saw her standing at the window staring into the night.  Her head and shoulder leaned against the frame, and her arms were crossed in front of her.  Wearing just his tee-shirt, her long legs were bare and the hem of the shirt fell just below...for one incredible moment he wondered if she wore anything beneath.

He cleared his throat to get her attention – and to be sure he was still capable of speech.  She was startled when she turned to him, then flustered as she realized what she was wearing.  His robe was draped across the end of the bed, and she walked over to grab it.

"Hi," she greeted him quietly as she shrugged into the robe.  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"I'm not sure that you did, but as long as I was up I thought I'd check on you," he said, still a little distracted.  Seeing her standing there in his robe wasn't much better than before.

"I just couldn't sleep.  Then I found if you stand over here," she walked back to the window, "and lean just so, you can see the river."

"Well, you've discovered the secret to why I took this place – apartment with a view," he said with a smile as he walked to stand behind her.  She pointed to where she could see the Potomac.  He was close enough to catch the mixed fragrances of soap, the perfume in her hair, and Amanda's own scent.  "Well, I'll be damned," he whispered as he leaned to see her discovery.

"You didn't know that?" she turned her head to look at him and her face was just inches from his.  He heard her breath catch in her throat, then felt a pang of disappointment as she stepped away from him and turned to study the street below from her new angle.

Once again he felt the need to clear his throat.  "Can I get you anything?  Maybe that mug of warm milk?"

"No, I'll be okay.  I'm feeling more relaxed, and I think if I go back to bed soon I may actually get some sleep tonight," she smiled her thanks at him.

As he studied her, he struggled over how to say what he was feeling.  "Amanda, I'm sorry," he said unexpectedly.

"For what?" she asked, looking truly confused.  "You haven't done anything to be sorry for."

"Yes, I have...or at least I feel like I have," he ran his hand through his hair in frustration before continuing.  "If it weren't for me, you never would have been involved in any of this.  You never would have met David Benson and you never would have been in a position where he could hurt you."

"Lee, it's not your fault," she said adamantly.  "Did you know this would happen when you introduced me to David?"

"No!  Hell, Amanda...I liked him.  I considered him a friend."

"So, other than introducing me to David – which you didn't know would be dangerous – what have you done wrong?  Huh?" she waited a moment for his answer, but he had none.  "Besides, David had already seen me at the office, he said so himself.  So, the only other way this wouldn't have happened is if I'd never met you and was never at the Agency."

He didn't know what to say to that.  It had been a long time since he'd thought that things might be easier if he'd just given that package to someone else.  She had become such a part of his life that he was no longer sure what he would do without her.

"Anyway, I'm the one who should apologize," she countered.

"All right, this is getting ridiculous," he couldn't believe the direction this conversation was taking.  "What the hell are you apologizing for?

"I gave David the opportunity to get to you."

"Amanda, I thought we'd been all through this…"

"Yes, I know..." she interrupted him, "'weakness of working with a partner.'  But, Lee, I don't want to be your weakness.  I don't want it to be known that 'Scarecrow' is vulnerable because of me."

He really didn't understand where all this was coming from.  He'd always protected her before, why was this so upsetting to her?

* * *

She was determined that he know how important this was to her.  If she was ever going to be taken seriously and considered for training as a full agent, she had to gain respect.  She turned away from him and sighed.  Being Lee's Achilles' heel wasn't going to help her cause.

More important than all of that, "I don't ever want you to resent me," she stared at the floor, having put her real fear into words.  He'd come to mean too much to her.  What would she do if he ever decided she was too much of a burden to him?

"Hey...none of this was your fault," he touched her hand, then wrapped his long fingers around hers.  "I could never resent you for something you didn't do."   

When she looked back up at him and saw the intensity in his expressive hazel eyes, she again heard the whispered questions in her mind.

* * *

Lee was about to get lost in the brown depths of her eyes.  She stood so near to him.  Just one step and he would be close enough to feel her warm breath on his chest.  One step to be close enough to bow his head and finally taste her.  He took that step.

Her eyes widened and her breath quickened.  He was right, he could feel the warmth.  He tentatively leaned toward her, not sure if this was what she needed – or what he wanted.

She reached up to run her fingers through his hair, then wrapped her hand around the back of his neck.  He felt the slight pressure as she pulled him to her, and all doubt was gone.  He wanted nothing more than to kiss her, and knew she felt the same.

He was gentle and tender; exploring her lips with his. When he pulled back to gauge her response, she tightened her grasp on his neck.  This time he deepened the kiss, his hands finding her waist and pulling her to him.

She wrapped her arms around him and felt the smooth hardness of his back and shoulders.  The heat from his body came through the thin fabric of his shirt, and she could feel the rhythmic flex of his muscles when he moved.  Her hands trailed down his back and, as she began pulling his shirttail, he moved from her mouth to explore her neck with his lips.  She tilted her head to more fully expose her throat to his exploration.  As he kissed his way toward her collarbone, he brought his hand up to pull away the fabric of the robe and reveal her soft skin.

How many times had he imagined this?  Holding Amanda close, kissing her and feeling her accepting response.  He'd even caught himself thinking of taking things further, but had always backed away from those imaginings; somehow knowing it was dangerous territory.  He caught himself now and pulled away from her.

"Amanda, I'm sorry," he apologized.  "I shouldn't be doing this.  After everything that's happened today ..." he cursed himself for being so selfish.  "I would never...you must know, I'd never take advantage of you..."

She placed her index finger on his lips to silence him.  "This has nothing to do with what happened today...and you know it."  Her hand moved to caress his cheek, then slid down his neck to rest on his shoulder.

As she captured his mouth in a soft kiss, he fought a battle within himself.  This felt so incredibly right; but he couldn't press it.  His self-control was stretched thin, and he had to know this was what she wanted.  "Amanda, tell me now if this needs to stop.  You have to be the one to say no," his voice sounded hoarse with passion, even to his own ears.

"Lee, I'm not going to say no," she leaned toward him and drew him back to her lips, all the while undoing the buttons on the front of his shirt.  When the last one was unbuttoned, she ran her hands up over his chest then eased his shirt off his shoulders and down his arms.

As she began planting kisses on his smooth, bare chest, she could smell his cologne.  That scent had intoxicated her before, but this time she had the added pleasure of feeling the warmth of his skin.  She lightly teased his nipple with her tongue before raising her head to again find his mouth.

His hands came up to the collar of the robe, and he eased it over her shoulders and down her arms to let it puddle on the floor.  He then placed his hands on her waist and slowly caressed his way up her ribcage to rest his palms just below the curve of her breasts.  His thumbs slid up the underside of each, and found her already hardened nipples.  As he lazily stroked through the fabric of the shirt, they became even more taut and she arched toward him to increase the pressure.

Needing to feel his hands on her bare skin, she reached for the hem of the tee-shirt and pulled it over her head.  He gently massaged her breasts, enjoying their weight and softness against his palms.  Leaning down, he kissed each one then claimed a nipple in his eager mouth.  "Lee.." she whispered his name and ran her fingers into his hair, clutching the back of his head.

Releasing his prize, he steered her backward the two steps it took to reach the bed, then sat down and pulled her with him.  He leaned to lay her on the bed, and as he stretched out beside her, he returned to his pleasure – caressing and teasing with his tongue and fingertips.

He felt her fingernails run over his skin just above the waist of his pants as she began working on his belt buckle.  While slowly lowering his zipper, her fingers brushed against his arousal and he couldn't stop the moan that escaped his lips.  She began stroking him through the soft cotton of his boxers, and he had to grab her hand to stop her movements or he would explode too soon.

Caressing her hip, he began to toy with the waist of her silk panties.  When he slid beneath the fabric, he felt her even silkier skin, and explored lower through her soft hair to her moist warmth. She arched against him as he slid his long finger inside her, and he continued to suckle her breast while he stroked and used his thumb to stimulate her.

"Lee, I need _you_," she whispered to him, desperate to feel the weight of his body pressed against her and have him inside to fulfill her aching need.  With a final swirl of his tongue and a gentle nip, he released her then leaned up to place a soft kiss on her lips. Kneeling beside her, he removed the final bit of silk from her body and threw the soft piece of fabric to join his robe on the floor.  He then stood, lowered his slacks and boxers, and kicked them out of the way.

Lying on his bed she was bathed in the soft light from the open door and he couldn't remember if he'd ever seen anything more beautiful.  His eyes traveled up her long legs and over her soft curves to finally rest on her dark hair spread across the white pillow.  Her hungry eyes were studying his body candidly, without a hint of shyness, and her     undisguised admiration increased his desire.

He reached into the nightstand drawer and took out a small packet.  "I'd like to do that," she spoke as he tore open the wrapper.  Another surprise from her.  Not that the request was unheard of, but it's something he hadn't expected from Amanda.

As he lay back down beside her, he handed her the packet and sought her mouth in a lingering, possessive kiss.  She pulled away from him to remove the pliable disk from its wrapper and positioned it on the end of his arousal.  He was hard and hot; using her thumb and fingertips, the slick, tight sheath slid easily over his length.  She gripped him with her hand to feel the weight and heat of him and, as he moved to cover her soft, delicate body with his own muscular one, she guided him to her, then wrapped her arms around his waist.

He entered her slowly, a little deeper with each thrust of his hips, until he finally filled her completely.  Her hands traveled down his back to clutch him and still his movements.

"Are you okay?" he whispered, rising to his elbows, ready to pull back.

"Yes...only...please don't move yet," her voice was full of emotion.  Just having him sink fully into her had almost caused her to climax.  

He reached his hand to smooth the hair from her face, and looked in wonder at the passion he saw in her eyes.  How was it he never suspected this of her?  How could he not have seen that she would be a passionate lover?

She began to move, slowly and sensuously, and he tried to match her movements.  Looking into each other's eyes, they found their rhythm.  He claimed her lips and she opened her mouth to allow him entry.  As she felt his teasing, she gently sucked while returning his exploration.  Her body movements became more intense and she gave a low moan from the back of her throat.

That moan almost sent him over the edge.  Groaning, he tore his mouth away from hers before the actions of her tongue ended it all too soon.  He buried his face in her neck, then traced her jaw with his tongue until he came to her ear, nibbling and sucking lightly on her sensitive lobe.

She gently bit into his shoulder, then as quickly released it.  Her waves of pleasure surged hard and fast, and she arched against him uncontrollably, wanting him to penetrate her deeper and harder.  Her ecstasy was almost unbearable in its intensity.

He felt her climax as she contracted around him, and heard her call out to him, "Oh, Lee...pleas …"  Her throaty cry was the end of his self-control.

"Amanda..." he could no longer deny himself and kept repeating her name as he felt her equal response.  Her body met his, thrust for thrust, and as his physical release came, he felt the wet warmth of his passion and the familiar rush of pleasure spread through his body.

But this time, there was something more – something intangible that settled around his heart as the fury of the moment subsided and the calm set in.  He relaxed against Amanda and trailed gentle kisses from her ear to her mouth.  He didn't know how to explain this new feeling, but knew definitely that it was unique to Amanda.

* * *

They lay in each other's arms and Lee felt the need to tighten his embrace – he just couldn't get her close enough to him.  Their legs were entwined and he used his knee to pull her even nearer.

She snuggled contentedly on his shoulder and wrapped her arm more securely around his waist.  "Lee?"

"Hmmm?"

"You can forget what I said earlier."

"What do you mean?  About what?"

"You know, what I said about going back to bed and actually getting some sleep tonight."

He chuckled and pulled her to him to kiss the top of her head.

–The End–


End file.
